on Wednesday, July 1, 2009
In a rush.
No margin in my life. No room for the spontaneous, for reflection, for living in the moment.
I'm not alone; guilt is my constant companion. She rides me through the ever constant to do's that rule my day sapping joy from work I love.
Sleep, time and quiet become my idols. Grasping and lusting after them only fattens my already obese day as they taunt me, hovering like a mirage on the horizon.
The muscle of perspective needs to be strengthened although not rude, it waits patiently at the bottom of the list.
Always at the bottom.
Til I have the courage to ignore the noise of urgent and focus on the depth of important. Til I slay the habits of culture and embrace the reality of loving the ones I'm with.
To choose to ride the winds of change, floating activity designed to enjoy the hearts in my life and to be content with an unknown destination; not one of my choice, but chosen for me before the conception of my friend time; for a purpose beyond both of us; for His pleasure.
Resolve shackles my trust and faith in the designer of the Big Picture. I surrender to Him the shreds of the precious day He gave me; ashamed at it's eternal waste ...
already profoundly forgiven.
"It's useless to rise early and go to bed late, and work your worried fingers to the bone.
Don't you know he enjoys giving rest to those he loves?"
Labels: who knows